redemption.

theres a lot of things in this world which are hard to distinguish from fantasy and reality. people always perceive things that aren't there, hope for things which aren't real and even when you try to trap yourself in that fantasy happy world you fucking face the real harsh shitness of reality. i keep trying to reassure myself in some way that there is some reason there that im doing this, or doing that but in the end there isn't really a reason behind things. people say theres a motive behind everything but honestly i dont even think and i just go with whatever is happening nowdays. its like my own selfconsciousness has just given up and i dont even know left from right anymore. theres nowhere to look anymore but down at my own two feet and see where theyre headed, maybe one day they will be four feet walking.