redemption.

since your friend doesn't have the courtesy to remain decent, and i don't have the patience to remain neutral im going to say everything that shaped this choice:

• your friend pushed us into it in the first place. i was on the bridge and i only wanted you as my formal date because you were the most compatible person at the time but your friend took that as more and tried to force things.
• you never talked to me enough. im not a brick wall, even more recently i've noticed how much i need friends and if i were to get into a relationship with someone i wouldn't want to talk to them once a week and see them once a month, not even and you live far far away.
• sometimes the things you like, the things you do, the things you find important, the things which aren't important, even more so supported by your ignorant friends messed up ideas, it pushes me away even further.
• you have your hsc, i don't have my hsc. our morals and priorities are different. our ideas surrounding a lot of things aren't in line and i never felt comfortable around you once in my life.
• even though you were a great friend, and thats all i wanted it to be, you and your friends kept pushing it and pushing it and it got to the stage where i just let it go on. but when someone incessantly pushes you into something or onto something, its natural instinct to not want to. we never did anything. and thats that. when i see your reaction, not even giving me a response, when i see your friends actions, swearing their head off at me, two-faced as. it makes me realise how little i regret ending it now rather than later. don't pretend that you liked me that much when you barely talked to me, when you were hanging out and talking with other guys more than me. when we met like five times in our lives. life is too overrated for that. live your own life, move on with your own life and change into a better person because you, and especially your friend, needs to mature more. honestly, i find it hard to even bother writing up this because i honestly feel like you don't deserve it anymore. i don't need to justify myself because i know with my heart that it was the right decision.

life is about living every moment you have, living a life of no regrets because like my really close friend always tells me:
-  nothing kills you except the last thing.