redemption.

dam, she really does make me feel peaceful sometimes. its a clenching yet nice feeling. ive been a little lost lately but if theres one thing i know, ill miss my that sense of peace i got from seeing my friends at library when i got there, the hours i spent with them studying and joking around. it actually makes me a little teary. i use to hate being around people because i was so self conscious and timid but now i dont think i can live without people like these people in my life, it just gives me a little happiness and sense of security and i feel like after HSC im not going to able to see friends everyday like this... maybe its cus i was listening to that song while typing this. made me feel a little more emotional HAHA. fook, okay i cried happy? but honestly, moments like these go by so fast and even though they're not as technically fun as other times, being able to just see friends let alone talk with them is enough for me. im really not strong eh.. okay now im just fucking depressed over this. i gotta stop before my eyes get puffy FOOK. but im really grateful that i have people who i can talk with so freely, even if i haven't known them for long i feel like i've been friends for ages compared to people who i've been friends with for ages and although theres all those things that i know about them and just expect them to do things.. i haven't even felt as close to them as i do with some people i've only met for a few days sometimes.
i also noticed today when people are touchy, it makes you feel like you have a better relationship with them sometimes... no homo. heh. better stop now!
OK. took deep breaths, tehhe. im good, but i really do love those moments when my heart starts beating fast. :D